‚ô• Thursday, March 24, 2011
im not defending you because, if you seriously bother why not go confront her if you think she reject you. why bother to say stuff behind her back? WTF? not because im close with her im saying this. but. look at yourself. so political. yucks.
com'on. we know our limits ours size our looks. don't you? if you know you are huge, (ok im too) but at least u would know why if you are rejected. look around. you ever see your size people around other then "those area" cause he don't bother about huge or wad as long you can sell. but. look again. ever see in nvl, rcd, d8, nana, girls in ur size? since alr know about the size, then why blame others if you get rejected? roflmao?! bitch. you call her that? maybe u shuld call urslf that for being so bitchy. (:
ok. time for me to get back my previous weight again. i've gain weight ever since i got so stress with school work. and not having enough rest cause someone took of her schedule so i help out by doing her slots but she's back (: so, everything will be back to normal. (:
yest replaced Elise for a roving event. the pay is good. better then being a dancer serious. it was so awesome. just that. the enviroment sucks cause, COFFEESHOP WTH. and i think i smell like it yesterday. after roving i rushed down. i was so late. so late. lucky sheena cover it for me. i told her in the evening though. cus, im abit broke due to pay not out yet. no it's not 1 wk pay it's 2 week. so yah. ): and elise passed me the pay in cash before i work. (::
kept spending and lending people money and i didn't realised. worst. my friend can still forget she borrowed from me. cui ttm.
it was actually quite great seeing karen yest at aura, she came down with madeline. and OMGAHHH!! sophia make me so paiseh la. she keep telling me her name is mac-queen i don't know how to spell it. and... yest, she told me im madeline ><!! LOL! and. everyone laughhht cccuuuuiiiiii! so embarrass.
so after work we went down to butterfly which was a rd across aura i suppose? i cant rem. i jus followed sheena. saw jack there, as well as lookers manager or wad de. LOL! i kept talking. aiya. wadever. i cant be bothered cause i know they sucks so from my point of view i just say what i like. (: i cant be bothered.
cause, actually before i had this conflict with my previous agent, alot of boss/managers already ask me not to work for him cause they think i work too hard and he deduct pay ok. yes i know im late but if i can sell u still wan deduct me so much? you should give chance or maybe deduct lesser. plus i was sick that day and it was raining there's no cab in that area and i tried to run there. i was drench lor. they even so nice that. LOL, my drinks are normally coke or orange juice. MUAHAHHAHAHA! =D i still rem few weeks back when i was working at hollywood i saw upub boss and manager and ah 5, LOL! WE ALL JUMPED UP AND DOWN! HAHAHAHAHA! WTFF i know. LOL! ok. they are great people. nicest of all i've seen.
Labels: dancer, lookers, upub
Blogged @ 2:37:00 PM
‚ô• Friday, December 24, 2010
worked with joline. she says, she kanna spike and was having a headache since 1am. accompanied her till bout 1.45am and i continued to work. and i gotta work alone. till the time to knock off.
seeing her in that state. im feeling very lost really. i felt so much like crying. but i can't. i don't like showing my emotions out. really. i detest it. even when i was upset while i was with him, i would cry silently beside him. while he's asleep.
i cant stand the pain anymore. everytime, i would feel like slitting myself to forget about the pain. although i only did it once. no twice. first was 5 yrs back. and second was a mth back or few weeks back..
im really living aimlessly recently ever since i get to realize alot of things.. i would just walk and walk and bang on sth, i didn't even notice. i've done it twice today. having bruises all over my knee.
sometimes i wonder, why wouldn't that damn car jus bang on me. Straight. so it's either i survive it with the pain or jus go and never feel the pain any more. people know me well would know, im not like this. never once i have such thoughts going thru my mind. sometimes it really scares me alot.
how did i turn myself this way?
why whenever i realize things. it's too late?
i felt like leaving this place. that's full of sorrows and regrets.
called sophia helplessly earlier on. telling her the situation and i doesn't know what to do. cause they are normally drunk after me. i really don't know how when i don't know where she stay.
i'm exhausted from every single thing that is happening.
felt like quitting school already.
i lost everything just in a year.
e v e r y t h i n g .
i would give my life to anyone.
if i could.
Labels: dancer, lookers, S
Blogged @ 5:32:00 AM
‚ô• Friday, November 26, 2010
Ok. finally, i found a someone. with a spare phone. (::
i almost wanted to tell jimmy last min that i can't work, cus im scare. recently too much customers thought im those typical Vietnam girls that work there. FML. some even said im from malaysian cause i have an accent. GAH!
THIS SERIOUSLY SUCKS.
im at lookers again. tonight.
i hope. today...
sale is awesome like wed.
and never to forget that Isabelle is 20 after mid night.
imma working so i don't think i'll be able to keep track of time.
so....
happy 20th birthday. Labels: lookers, zz
Blogged @ 7:26:00 PM
‚ô• Thursday, November 25, 2010
today is aewsome. XD!!! thank god. she's great!!! loves muchhiiie muchhiieee!!!
tequila was way too much. lucky, i make a note in mind to...... eat alot today. -.-"
max love wan lor. i tot we wun even hit target but. i think we over hit it. yay!!!!
ok wadever it's i dunno wth am i doing. good night ppl. it's 3:31.
finished bathing and stuff.
i really hope to know who is the pte num that called me ard 10+pm. somewhat i hoped it's...... i know it's near impossible.
having a huge urge to call him up earlier on... but.......................
urghs, phone is having probs.
he didn't realised that, he shuld know the pw to this space of mine ever since the day i asked him to do me a huge favor. the pw, i told him it's up to him to help me change as long he tell me wad's it.
i told sophia today during dinner, i wouldn't care anymore. it's redundant like he said. idk im confused now. missed his hug badly
but... we should know where we stand isn't? ):
after today during work, i know being truthful, doesn't help at all. it just sucked. really. guys rather being lied to. they enjoyed it. alot. so i think which was a reason why, i kept wanting to be truthful always, but. it wasn't what it should have been!
but. i didn't del the post. i dun del post. it was an accident that it was being post up. but i saw it during the noon when i woke up and i tried to save it back. Which was why it disappear. it wasn't supposed to be up in the first place.
i know, he doesn't need this but. i still wish him all the best for his exam on fri. Labels: lookers, S
Blogged @ 3:32:00 AM
‚ô• Wednesday, June 23, 2010
fucking suay.the only wallet that made me used it for almost 3 years was missing on mon. i duno why is it missing cus, my camera, my phone was still around. and further more. my camera was worth more then my wallet cus, my wallet is so cui alr. but.. i still like it very much.
YES part of it is because it's the only thing from him that im still using. for such a long time. remembering how it was being given to me just made me even more sad. called sophia and told her. I dont care about the money being missing in my wallet. i just hope someone return it to me even if it's a empty wan. cus, inside. there's actually quite abit of cash i would say. and his atm card along with mine. and a memory card that has almost all our photos. ): seriously i regret putting inside my wallet. that memory card wasn't even mine. sighs.
That day, i guess it's because i saw Thomas there. happily half half with him with his glass of martel rocks and one shot of tequila in it. damn. after not long. i dunno wad happen around anymore. i heard i bite my partner joline. im so sorry.
and i guess i made my own bf super upset regarding this incident. as it should be me looking after my own belonging yet im saying him stupid. cus he did not check for my wallet. sighh.
urghs. im still very sad about this losting my wallet. GAH!
Labels: aaron koh, lookers, S
Blogged @ 2:05:00 PM
