‚ô• Sunday, December 04, 2016
The Secondary School that I have studied for 4 years probably more than 10 years ago is going on renovations. Photos were post everywhere on social media.
It came so sudden that I thought of you, zhu.
So many What ifs appear.
How I'd hope we could all go back... maybe things wouldn't end this way.
I wouldn't met A, I wouldn't feel that I cant face you and probably we would have last and I wouldn't have met S. which till date, I couldn't totally forget. probably due to the decision I have made.
This need to stop. URGHS.
Labels: zz
Blogged @ 4:16:00 AM
‚ô• Friday, July 13, 2012
everytime, when we took a wrong step it's another person gain.
unrepairable//
congrats on the wedding. lzz. =)
may the hurt 5 years ago be gone. Labels: zz
Blogged @ 7:50:00 PM
‚ô• Tuesday, December 13, 2011
i think, i really always tends to do stuff opposite i wanted it.
i screwed everything up again.
but seeing zz got attached. for a moment i laugh. both yt and me was wondering what is the method this time is it still military style.. or more human.
i cannot help myself pissing him off. even when i know that he is having some problems.
even when he told me actually he is trying so hard to be cheerful but he seems so fine that.. sometimes i really cannot control things that i wanted to say. again. i say things harshly again.
i even lied to him about messaging that girl about it. and i think he believed it. hahaha..
sometimes it's really hard to try to even believe things when it happen again and again but with the different cast. really this is the third person..
Labels: S, zz
Blogged @ 2:16:00 AM
‚ô• Thursday, December 30, 2010
guess he went to drink and was drunk ba.
i don't know what am i feeling right now. after i saw that.
how i hope things are less complicated.
now, i realised, we
had to lie or hide things up be it we like it or not.
she said, she dunno why am i so frank
telling him that i like that tw guy in the past.
and stuff that happen
and telling zz about stuff that happen in the past.
i don't know ba... ):
Labels: S, zz
Blogged @ 7:34:00 AM
‚ô• Wednesday, December 15, 2010
The Least i needed.
suddenly i felt that i feel so disgusted by almost everyone.
first you dun treasure when things are yours, then you came crawling back. and then, wrote such stuff still intend to ask me to go back? wtf is this? lame. i could just say, im not brainless. not anymore. even if i thought of it before. no, im never going back. not anymore. you just simply doesn't know what to do with you life.
disgusting.
esp when everyone around you are almost the same as you're.
you said u read and it's it very obvious, so i think you should know that i love my ex? LOLed.
not you anymore. I could say, it seems that,
i love him even more then how i used to love you. he might not be the one who pulled me out of the hell, because Remy was. But he was the one who've been thru hell with me.
remember those days when i plead like a puppy when you just came back? Do you remember what did you tell me? How did you push me off? you push me off like how a owner is dumping a pile of rubbish. when things are all messed up, you came back. Blamed me for having a bf. Blamed me for moving on.
Worst thing a person would do is to say, "so when are you breaking off with you bf?" wad's this crap? You even said stuff like all you love was me?
WTF? if so, where's all the evidence? those girls you had? nah they just prove that, you don't love me like how you said. it's just showing me plain simple that. you need someone there. anyone would do the job. so.
GET LOST from my life.
I don't need you anymore.
and please stop your crap about how i mistreat you when, i did not. it was you who slept with someone else. HOW DARE YOU SPOUT NONSENSE TO PEOPLE SAYING HOW BAD I WAS? Even i was bad to you, please it was the start of the relationship when we haven't even settled down and, all i did was to give people number when they asked. but i never replied. and i would say i didn't even ill-treated you. and, please remember something. it's you snatched me forcefully away from my ex.
WHEN YOU NEEDED HELP, I WAS THE ONLY PERSON WHO HELP YOU. EVEN WHEN YOU OWN MOTHER COULD NOT.
PLEASE BE GRATEFUL.
and not turning your back and bite people when they treated you so well.
Even a dog knows who's good and bad. sad to say, you are worst then a dog.
Even if, he doesn't wan to patch with me, i would not go back to you. NOT ANYMORE. (:
I rather wait for him then wasting my time with you.
If humans, are born to be fake, i'd be one too. Labels: aaron koh, remy, S, zz
Blogged @ 1:00:00 PM
‚ô• Sunday, December 12, 2010
Do you still remember the purpose of doing sth?
be it what ever thing.
will you still remember the purpose?
Everyone will forget.
that include you.
alot of stuff, i could still remember clearly as though it just happened yesterday.
the words that we shared. those text messages. phone calls.
i hate to admit this, but i remember them all, so clearly.
Who says people are worth the second chance? that's just a saying. nth, nth will be given a second chance. When people realized their mistake it's always too late. who is going to give them a chance? Remember the Yellow ribbons? nah. that's just for show.
am going to self destruct. again.
This pain ain't going off. just like how my knee hurts, my heart hurts as well. it hurts more then my knee. remembering, the amount of blood i saw yesterday on my knee was horrid, my heart hasn't stop bleeding not at all. it is starting to scare me now.
second time. this is the second time.
you used to say, i don't trust you. but likewise, you never believed me.
there's actually so much stuff that you had already long forgotten.
how i actually hope im having your brain instead. so i wouldn't remember.
love? it's jus a toy.
sex? a pleasure.
kids? people says it's symbol of love? nah. i think it's the worst nightmare.
Just pass him those metal eggs, i tried doing and the image i cut out bit by bit shadow by shadow. those contained my blood, my tears, everything. i cut myslf accidentally due to the tears that keep coming out when i was cutting the shades of our face. if, this, doesn't show how much, or rather how deep my feelings are, then im sorry for not expressing it out.
passed him the couple angel as well. cause i no longer need it. it's suppose to be a pair like the mickey and minnie, but.. sadly, i don't want to separate the pair, so i gave him both. those are done. during the period where i should be rushing my school work. I do not want to take any credits for it. but. because, people had been saying that. He has done alot. given alot, scarifies alot of time, blablabla. yes he had, but it doesn't mean, i did not do anything at all actually there's more stuff. it's just that. they are awful that i threw them off.
The tie dan. that i used one entired day to make. cus it need constant reboiling. and i started at 7am, ended at 8pm.
passed him the helmet zz bought for me years back. alot of memories in it as well. but fuck all those memories. i don't wan remember anymore things. i realized those who remember stuff hurts more then those who couldn't remember stuff
This was even worst, drawn the day before assessment while i should be rushing my finals with Samantha in school on a sunday night.
i have never once regretted so much stuff once in my life. so much that my tears wouldn't stop falling. now, that's the only way i would fall asleep. There's really so much that i wanted to say. but. i no longer could say them out.
sometimes, i hope im dead.
Labels: petrify tots, S, zz
Blogged @ 7:00:00 AM
‚ô• Friday, November 26, 2010
Ok. finally, i found a someone. with a spare phone. (::
i almost wanted to tell jimmy last min that i can't work, cus im scare. recently too much customers thought im those typical Vietnam girls that work there. FML. some even said im from malaysian cause i have an accent. GAH!
THIS SERIOUSLY SUCKS.
im at lookers again. tonight.
i hope. today...
sale is awesome like wed.
and never to forget that Isabelle is 20 after mid night.
imma working so i don't think i'll be able to keep track of time.
so....
happy 20th birthday. Labels: lookers, zz
Blogged @ 7:26:00 PM
‚ô• Saturday, May 15, 2010
i seriously hate such feeling, when someone still keep something useless and further more tell me. like seriously,
WTH.
if it's really over then don't keep such useless stuff. or rather don't even say out even if u keep it.
since from my pov, it's impt to u, that u kept for so long. then, i shan't make anymore effort, it's like pointless when it's occupied. from the very start you spoke to me, when it's occupied as well. sometimes i dont feel like saying i know everything, but rather keeping things i know unknown is rather hard. idk, maybe my choice was wrong from the start.
i thought. you are different, but. i forgotten, guys are still all the same. no matter how alike we are, you are still a guy. someone who don't really have the same thoughts as him.
Labels: S, zz
Blogged @ 5:13:00 AM
